I have been attempting to educating myself on classical music, ever since watching “Inspector Morse”, in vain hope of becoming clever like Inspector Morse (for he was educated and cultured about art, especially in opera or classical music).
Yet I struggled to make a headstart fr the matter, on how to find my favourite sound. I felt that I was a man in sea, not knowing where to start.
Luckily my favourite band Epica came to my rescue, the album was based on their performance in Miskolc Opera Festival in 2008, filled with classical tracks, famous movie music, opera and their own songs. Through them I was able to re-interact with classical music, and able to find the names of those music I heard since childhood.
Went to watch “Far from the Madding Crowd” with my friend J,
I remember watching the television version in 1998 back in Ashville, at the EFL room.
The story constantly left me drowsy, mainly for many ideas uncleared.
One of thing I remembered of, was that the woman being courted by three men, and one of them shoot the other to death.
This time however, the film provided a richer description on the situation and the world the characters were in, which made the story a lot more whole.
Throughout the film I liked Gabbriel Oak the most, as he was calm, careful, very critical and objective on various matter. These skills enabled him to help Bathsheba the heroine to solve many situations, therefore made him a match/equal for her without dealing with actual wealth. Mr Bolden the gentleman was too cotrolling – maybe because he lived a sheltered life with people in distance, so Bathsheba was like a breath of fresh air for him. Yet like the old man in Marquez’s “Memoirs of My Melancholy Whore”, he gone mad with desire. I dislike Troy deeply, for his recklessness with Bathsheba.
Two unforgettable scenes – one was the beginning when sheeps that Gabriel once owned fell to their deaths from jumping off the cliff, the scene was so horrific I almost screamed. The other was the proposals – the first round poposals of both Gabriel and Mr Bolden, they both offered Bathsheba marriages and mentioned “and a piano”. Piano back then was something that all women have to learn in order to be worth the pursuit, of course in current days it would be seen as stupid and sexist. J and I laughed over it, this seemed a far cry for us – our freedom to chosse to be married or not, and how back then these things were so hard to happen.
It took me a while to finish “Gabriel’s Inferno” and talk about it,
it surprised me in every possible way – mostly on the amount of involvement over Dante himself, religion and the ideology of heaven and hell in between the conversations of characters. I guess that made the romance novel less cheesy or less “dumb-looking” (aka brainless f-ing at every pages). So yes I enjoyed the novel as a matter of fact, it also made me want to read Dante properly, especially on the section of inferno.
I never was able to explain why but I have had a fascination which I believed last a life time on inferno itself, maybe because I was aroused by the horror and the deeper meaning behind those sins. As I had my conversation with R on the matter, she spoke of Zita Law’s work.
Ah, I remember how I used to love her “Pawnshop No.” – a man was forced to sell his soul to the devil to keep family in peace, he had people selling all they have in him, until his great-granddaughter came over and was willing to sell everything she has to be an absolute success in her field…
I surrendered myself to the idea of buying the novel from British Heart Foundation for one pound, after days and nights of consideration and hesitation.
I had googled the novel and given a lot of thought on what extent it would worth my one pound, I want the money to be spent on a book I knew I would read and lost my heart in the duration.
The novel as a matter of fact, was very much beyond me in almost every level.
Firstly I was amazed by the author’s patience on carving Dante’s essence in between the pages, from the whispers between lovers to academic debates. Even there might be questions on accuracy, but having such patience to do so was rather amazing if I may say so.
Secondly I was surprised by the way things went in the pages so far, Gabriel Emerson the Dante Specialist came to scene as a man with bad manners, often found himself in some foul positions. He was also slowly revealed as the pages progressed to be a man with terrible past, the kind of men who you would despice – a jack-ass, basically. Yet he seemed wanting to become better for Julia, a woman who he deemed to be a woman too precious to be contaminated.
Thirdly there were two things I was reminded of, first the relationship between Gabriel and Julia reminded me of Japanese televisions, which often have stories of students falling for teachers (or other way round). The other was Dante Gabriel Rossetti, a man equally obsessed with Dante’s story as Emerson himself. They both deemed their lover to be the muse and salvation, while Emerson tried his best to be honest and earnest to Julia, DGR was very much underserving to Lizzie Siddal for constantly being a magnet for women.
But yes it was only 8 or 9 hours since I bought the book and I already read 18 chapters…As an opinion, I think this book actually worth greater attention compared to 50 Shades of Grey, at least Emerson seemed less abusive compared to Christian Grey.
Around mid February, I watched the two most distinctive BDSM film in the same week. One with my friend J, one with my man. The two film talked similar theme with different context and background, and therefore received very different fate from one another.
The one I watched with J filled with a man and a woman, the woman was inexperienced and the man was “so-called” damaged inside despite great deal of wealth. He showered her with luxuries that ordinary people could not possibly afford, while grooming her to be able to adjust his BDSM preference. She wanted him with her own ideals of what love supposed to be, while she was able to adjust some parts of it, she began to grow fearful over his controlling ways – for example, stalking her all the way to her mother’s hometown. He often placed her in isolated state, secrecy left her impossible to consult others for the situation. Eventually she decided to leave, for feeling too overwhelmed by him.
The other one I watched filled with a woman who had been troubled by self-harm and a lawyer who has been dealing with his dominating nature, he was her boss. One night he saw her harming herself and resolved to stop her doing so, by giving orders to her on things to be done. The effect strangely turned her to better state, while families were worried for her. Eventually her boss feared his nature out of control and rejected her, yet she won him back by fighting her way and her patience.
Both film were equally pretty and lovely, yet I enjoyed the latter better for greater positivity and the characters seemed more equal.
Ever since I got back into Pinterest, I have found myself looping my way through different pins of things I was interested in.
My latest interest was Romance and Capitalism (plus a bit of gender studies?), the pattern of the two in different romance novels.
You see (anyone reading this), if you have read novels from Jane Austen, Jane Eyre (up to the very end) to modern ones such as the wealthy background of Edward Cullen and the wealthy position of Christian Grey. Men in the romance novel if you notice, seemed devided into either a very powerful position or a man with wealth and taste. Of course Gabriel Emerson was one of the type, he was a man with authority and academic success (He in the novel was University Professor on studies of Dante).
Women on the other hand in romance novel, often positioned (despite how strong they are character rise etc) with a strong sense of femininity and fragility, some were even virgin (just look at Anastasia Steele) – someone inexperienced and therefore posted very little to no threat toward the men. This therefore posted a questionable matter on many things, the especial interest I have had was the distinction of sincere love, or were those women still carrying the ideal to have men who are powerful in many levels like sugar babes and sugar daddies? The novels seemed implying that wealth was very much the only thing women would stay for a man? Despite women are free in some ways such as choices to how to live, we were bombarded everyday from internet to commercials on having many options available, which left people rather fearful for commitment. (http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/12/love-marriage-romance-valentine)
“Pre-modern people made a decision to marry based on a sense of social duty and convention. Modern people tend to do it out of a desire to realise our inner self, to be validated. Pre-modern people felt bound by a simple declaration of love; modern people prefer to keep their options always open, even after getting married.”
This shown that modern capitalism and the modernization had not freed us entirely, instead it left us panic over “would we have missed the better options?”. I would like to explore if possible in the future, was to why such patterns exist – hopefully I feel it would be something to do with the historical process of gender roles.
Please allow me to introduce myself 請讓我介紹我自己
I’m a man of wealth and taste 我是個有錢與品味的人
I’ve been around for a long, long year 我已經徘徊了一段很長的日子
Stole many a man’s soul and faith 抹滅了許多人的靈魂與信仰
And I was ’round when Jesus Christ 我曾在基督一旁
Had his moment of doubt and pain 當他被懷疑與承受苦痛的時刻
Made damn sure that Pilate 去該死的確認 Pilate (Pontius Pilate 向基督下有罪判決的法官)
Washed his hands and sealed his fate 清洗了他的手與封閉他的信仰
Pleased to meet you 很榮幸認識你
Hope you guess my name 希望你能猜猜我的名
But what’s puzzling you 不過這只會混淆你
Is the nature of my game 這天生就是屬於我的遊戲
I stuck around St. Petersburg 我被困在聖彼得堡
When I saw it was a time for a change 當我發現已經是時候做個改變 (俄國二月革命，民主化革命)
Killed the czar and his ministers 殺了沙皇以及他的部長們 (沙皇失權，全家被軟禁最後處死)
Anastasia screamed in vain 安娜塔西亞只能空虛的叫喊 (末代沙皇最小的女兒，有著逃過處死的傳說)
I rode a tank我開著坦克
Held a general’s rank帶著將軍的階級
When the blitzkrieg raged就在閃電戰肆虐
And the bodies stank而屍體發出腐臭的時刻
Pleased to meet you很榮幸認識你
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah希望你能猜猜我的名子，Oh Yeah
Ah, what’s puzzling you Ah, 這會混淆你
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah 因為這天生就是屬於我的遊戲，Oh Yeah
I watched with glee 我開心的看著
While your kings and queens 你的眾多國王與皇后
Fought for ten decades 世世代代的戰鬥
For the gods they made為了他們所建立的神明
I shouted out, 我大喊的問道
‘Who killed the Kennedys?’是誰殺了甘迺迪？
When after all畢竟
It was you and me這答案只有你我知道
Let me please introduce myself請容我介紹我自己
I’m a man of wealth and taste我是個富有且有品味的人
And I laid traps for troubadours而我給了那些吟遊詩人打下陷阱的根基
Who get killed before they reached Bombay那些在到龐貝城前就被殺掉的傢伙
Pleased to meet you很榮幸見到你
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah請你猜猜我的名子，Oh Yeah
But what’s puzzling you但這只會混淆你
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah, get down, baby因為這天生就是屬於我的遊戲，Oh Yeah，俯首稱臣吧，寶貝
Pleased to meet you很榮幸見到你
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah請你猜猜我的名子，Oh Yeah
But what’s confusing you但這只會困擾你
Is just the nature of my game只因為這天生就是屬於我的遊戲
Just as every cop is a criminal就像是每個警察都是個罪犯
And all the sinners saints還有那所有抱罪的聖人
As heads is tails就如同頭跟尾巴都無法區別
Just call me Lucifer就叫我 路西法 吧
‘Cause I’m in need of some restraint當然我需要節制些
So if you meet me所以當你見到我
Have some courtesy有禮貌些
Have some sympathy, and some taste帶有一些同情以及一點品味
Use all your well-learned politesse用出你學得最好的禮儀態度
Or I’ll lay your soul to waste, um yeah或著我就會安排你的靈魂在空虛浪費上，um yeah
Pleased to meet you很榮幸認識你
Hope you guessed my name, um yeah請你猜猜我的名子，Oh Yeah
But what’s puzzling you但這只會混淆你
Is the nature of my game, um mean it, get down因為這天生就是屬於我的遊戲，我是認真的，放棄吧！
Woo, who
Oh yeah, get on down
Oh yeah
Oh yeah!
Tell me baby, what’s my name告訴我吧寶貝，我叫什麼名子
Tell me honey, can ya guess my name告訴我吧蜜糖，你猜得出我的名子嗎？
Tell me baby, what’s my name告訴我吧寶貝，我叫什麼名子
I tell you one time, you’re to blame我已經告訴過你了，這是你的錯
Ooo, who
Ooo, who
Ooo, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Oh, yeah
What’s me name我是甚麼名子
Tell me, baby, what’s my name告訴我吧寶貝，我叫什麼名子
Tell me, sweetie, what’s my name告訴我，甜心，我叫甚麼名子
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Ooo, who, who
Oh, yeah
In the beginning I wasn’t a fan of the song, maybe because I was never a fan of Rolling Stone’s songs.
Yet the acknowledgement of it based on Baudelaire’s poems and “Master and Margarita” seemed very intriguiting.
When actually listen to the song, it was quite an awesome song,despite rumours of it being Satanic.
While the lyrics was largely based on the Devil in M&M, the noise of the instrument served to emphasize upon his contempt over the world. ..
Watched the American version of “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”,
you might wonder why now – as I never was in the mood of reading the novel, nor seeing the Swedish version of the film?
But I guess I just took years to feel like watching, since the theme involved heavily of violence toward women – from Lisbeth the main character to the woman who they tried to track down.
I adored Rooney Mara – she made a lot of drastic changes for this role, she was in the film as if she was the Lisbeth I imagined. The Swedish one wasn’t bad, but I liked Mara’s version for the contrast between her frail body and the extent of brutality she could carry out in return for the harm placed upon her. Her punk rock style also in part of my liking, as it reminded me of a character in Ai Yazawa’s NANA.
Daniel Craig was nice too, he was the kind of actor that can draw you to follow his every movement on the case. His interaction with Mara was heart-warming from time to time, even some were rather awkward to be put together.
The film clearly pictured the Swedish I was known through images etc that contributed to my stereotyped knowledge of Sweden, but it matched the atmosphere of the novel itself – the atmosphere of suffocation, preventing people to be able to break out or make a change.
Florence Nightingale – Inspiration Letter Notebook
I have always liked writing in my notebooks, notebooks like this mostly for stories or novel ideas.
My preference of notebooks have often been the Embellished Manuscript of Paperblank,
they used manuscripts, notes or letters of famous people onto the cover – which make the notebook itself extra special, carried the legacy in some ways.
Was watching “The Lovely Bones” at last, the film and the novel have been existed for some time. Yet I never got the courage to read, as it spoke of a girl being murdered.
The story began with Susie Salmon an ordinary 14-years old girl being murdered by a neighbour of her family, she watched in the interchange (bus stop kind of interchange I am referring to) between heaven and earth, of her family and friends coping with her absence. She also use her spiritual ability to help others, for example unsuccessfully attempt to make her dad turn back from running after the actual murderer. She also witnessed the changes within the family, from how her sister almost ended up being another victim, to how her mum and dad got into a breakdown in marriage for their take on breavement.
I liked the bit when she borrowed the body of a girl who could see ghost to kiss a boy she never managed to kiss when alive, but got pretty mad over the fact that the murderer never got caught despite numerous killing he made, even in the end his sin found him out by pushing him into the clifff. Yet then a lot of the time some of the people’s justice never got achieved, I feel bad for them.
The World of C.C. 